The Daily Combover - April 14, 2017

In some ways this has been a crazy week. War with North Korea seems more likely than ever; Trump dropped the largest bomb in world history; the new tax plan seems crazier than the last; and Planned Parenthood may soon disappear. Most shocking might be that the media is calling Trump "Presidential."

But in other ways, this hasn't really been any different than any other week under Trump. Infighting in the White House between Bannon and Kushner factions; Ivanka crying in the middle; Melania steering the grift train; etc.

So let's see what the Fontange Fuhrer thinks of it in his weekly address:

Transcript:

My fellow Americans,

This is a season of great hope.

Hmm maybe he missed the part where he started trying to lead us into a nuclear holocaust.

This week, Jewish families across our country, and around the world, celebrate Passover and retell the story of God’s deliverance of the Jewish people. The story of the Exodus is a story of freedom.  It is the story of an incredible people who were liberated from oppression and raised up the face of humankind.

Down through the centuries, the Jewish People have lived through one persecution after another–and yet, they persevered and thrived and uplifted the world beyond measure.  And now, the State of Israel stands as a monument to their faith and endurance.

Really? The way Spicer told it, it didn't seem so bad. Clearly Syrians under Assad have had it way worse than the Jews ever did.

Another day of faith and celebration is also upon us.

This Easter Sunday, Christians celebrate the resurrection of Christ and the promise of eternal salvation.  It is a holy day of reverence and worship; it is a sacred time that fills the spirit of our Nation with the faith of our people.

America is a Nation of believers.

Must be true. After all, they believed all of his BS.

As families gather in houses of worship across the Nation, we are grateful for the tremendous blessings of this land, our home. We have a beautiful country, an abundant countryside, and an amazing people with a truly bright and wonderful future.

From the beginning, America has been a place that has cherished the freedom of worship. That is the promise the first settlers saw in our vast continent—and it is the promise that our bravest warriors have protected for all of our citizens in centuries since, a long time ago.

And Trump's about to see to it that we end that proud tradition as soon as he can get a judge to leave his Muslim Ban in place.

Sadly, many around the globe do not enjoy this freedom—and one of the gravest threats to religious freedom remains the threat of terror.

On Palm Sunday, as Christians around the world celebrate the beginning of Holy Week, ISIS murdered at least 45 people and injured over 100 others at two Christian churches in Egypt.

We condemn this barbaric attack.  We mourn for those who lost loved ones.  And we pray for the strength and wisdom to achieve a better tomorrow—one where good people of all faiths, Christians and Muslims and Jewish and Hindu, can follow their hearts and worship according to their conscience.

Is this why he bombed the hell out of third most populous site in Afghanistan? Was this retribution?

With God’s grace, life always triumphs over death, freedom overcomes oppression, and faith extinguishes fear.  This is the source of our hope—and our confidence in the future.

I also want to give a special message to those struggling Americans who have felt for too long the bitter taste of hardship.  I want you to know: this White House is fighting for you.  We are fighting for every American who has been left behind.  We are fighting for the right of all citizens to enjoy safety and peace—and to work and live with the dignity that all Children of God are entitled to know.

As long as we have faith in each other, and trust in God, we will succeed.

Thank you. Have a Happy Easter, and a Happy Passover. God bless you. And God bless America. 

I wasn't exactly expecting him to talk about how he signed a bill into law that will be stripping health care from millions of women. Nor even a rebuke of Spicer's pro-Nazi propaganda. But something? Anything? Just a mention about the hell that he's unleashing politically, economically, or militarily around the world?

Call your loved ones. This is going to be a bumpy ride.

Catch you on the flip side.