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Tuesday, February 7, 2017

The Daily Combover - February 7, 2017

Surely one out of 50 of the Senators who voted to confirm Betsy DeVos isn't going to sleep well tonight, right? I mean they must have some compassion, right? Or is American Conservativism an actual mental disorder? It's pretty clear that in today's America, the inmates are running the asylum.

We, here at the Combover, recognize that for every glimmer of hope we have in resisting Trump, there are countless evils being done in its place.  Yes, we managed to put enough pressure on the administration to put it on the defensive with the Muslim Ban.  But we're essentially going to be helpless as the Department of Education is about to be shut down in favor of school vouchers and other-such profit-first schemes in the name of Betsy DeVos's version of Jesus. You know the one that enjoys higher crime rates, lower economic productivity, oh and what every conservative really wants at heart -- more abortions. You see, schooling builds human capital. It's something economists have researched since the dawn of industrialization (though that last Mincer link is to one of the most cited papers in all of economics and it's only about 70 years old). But it's more than just that. human capital doesn't just mean people will earn higher wages. It means they are less likely to commit crimes. They are more likely to continually build on their productivity.  And, yes, more schooling means more sexual education which, in turn, leads to fewer abortions.

But Trump and DeVos will be sure to put an end to that because private education has potential for short run profits. And in our cutthroat capitalist system, short run profits are better than life itself.

And then the morning comes.

You'd think Trump would be in a good mood. His buddy Robert Kraft just made millions off of his 5th Superbowl championship. One of his biggest donors, Betsy DeVos, gets her wish of getting to lay off half a million teachers as she destroys the public school system that our country has been languishing under since Jesus was riding around on his pet Stegosaurus.

But, no, instead he had to tell a lie about terrorist attacks being under-reported and then after being called out on it, it was time to double down and then even triple down. Luckily, he had O'Reilly around on Sunday to get people to lose interest on that because during the handjob O'Reilly was giving him, he decided that he wanted to ask Trump about Some Dude named Putin. Look, Putin sounds like a real nice guy and all, but it's pretty clear Trump doesn't know him. Know how I know? Because Trump said so this morning:
Trump's so amazing that he even started a hashtag for it: #1in. What a guy!

Know how awesome Trump is? He could lie to a sheriff association about murder rates and those spineless sheriffs would just lap it up. Heck, he could probably talk to them about destroying someone and they would just sit there and laugh. I hope it was worth dislodging Sean Hannity from Trump's ass to get a good lick. But Trump doesn't laugh at stuff like that. when he says he's going to end someone, he means it. And that's why I haven't set foot on 5th Avenue my last few visits to the City.

So remember Republicans. When you vote in the next member of the cabinet, presumably Jeff Sessions, this is what you are enabling. And that doesn't just make you a Nazi sympathizer, it makes you every bit the Nazi that Trump and Bannon are. Sleep well tonight but remember, Nazis always lose.

Catch you on the flip side America. Hope your children still is learning by the time we get there.

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